Out With The Old, In With The New
by The Durdens Wrath
Summary: Buffy's having dreams about her actions with Xander on Valentine's Day.
1. Prologue

It's about time! I thought Ms. Calendar and Giles would never leave the library! Buffy thought in a huff. Buffy looked into the library where Xander was pushing the mobile card catalog in front of the doors and she smiled. Oh Xander, you poor dear, if you really wanted to keep me away, you've got to remember that those doors swing OUT. Buffy's smile turned into a naughty grin. "Xander, my love. You are in for the surprise of your life."  
  
Buffy walked into the library wearing nothing but a short black raincoat and black high heels. When Xander turned around, she placed one hand on the card catalog and she propped the other up on top of the theft detector. When she saw the shock register on Xander's face, she raised her right ankle and rubbed it against her left calf. "Alone at last," she said.  
  
"Buff, give me a heart attack!"  
  
Buffy's eyes seemed to flare with passion as she walked seductively towards Xander. "Oh, I'm gonna give you more than that," she said as she began to undo the belt to her raincoat.  
  
Xander started to panic as Buffy advanced on him, her intent plainly written in her smoky eyes. His hands seemed to flail about wildly as if fending off unseen blows from an invisible assailant. "Buff, for the love of God, don't open that raincoat!"  
  
"Come on! It's a party! Aren't you gonna open your present?" As Buffy undid a button on her raincoat she pleaded with Xander with her eyes. Xander look into my eyes and tell me that what you see isn't real. Let this happen. To emphasize what her eyes were saying, she started to toy with the belt on her raincoat teasing Xander with what lay beyond.  
  
Xander's panic seemed to abate as he gazed into Buffy's eyes and seemed to be considering Buffy's words. Somehow his mind still managed to beat down the surge of hormones enough to consider Buffy's motives. "Buffy, you have no idea how much I want this, or how long I've dreamed of you wanting me like this. But, I gotta ask you Buffy, how do you know you won't regret this eventually?" Xander prayed that Buffy listened to reason because he knew that he didn't have the willpower to resist her toying with that belt much longer.  
  
As a predator can sense when its prey is no longer able to resist, so Buffy sensed that Xander no longer had any excuses to hide behind. Buffy suddenly looked like the cat that ate the canary as she looked at Xander. "Why would I regret it Xander? You don't plan on turning into a soulless monster anytime soon do you?" At this Xander shook his head. "Well, then. I can't see any reason for you not to open up my Valentine's present for you, can you? That is, unless you're afraid manly-man."  
  
At this, the last of Xander's resolve crumbled. Xander reached out and grabbed one of Buffy's hands away from the belt it was toying with, and drew her to him. "You know I've never gotten a gift quite like this for Val- ... well let's face it I've never gotten a gift like this for ANY holiday," Xander said as he brushed her cheek with the palm of his hand.  
  
Buffy leaned her face into Xander's hand. "You know what they say; it's the gift that keeps on giving."  
  
"One can only hope," Xander said as he lowered his lips for a kiss.  
  
"Mmmmmm... Xander... " Buffy moaned as Xander kissed her passionately. Wow! Angel never kissed like this. Now I know why he and Cordelia spent so much time in the janitor's closet. If I'd known he could kiss like this, I'd have been the one in the closet!  
  
"Buffy... Buffy..." That's odd. Xander's voice doesn't exactly sound like Xander. I must be getting lightheaded from this kiss! Buffy deepened the kiss as she felt one of Xander's hands move to undo the belt holding the raincoat together.  
  
"Buffy! Buffy!"  
  
Xander do you have to yell? I'm right in front of you! And why does your voice sound like my mom's? Buffy felt the raincoat fall open as Xander finished undoing the belt. She began to slowly shrug the raincoat off...  
  
"Buffy Summers! Wake up this instant!"  
  
Buffy sat bolt upright in her bed, the dream world with herself and Xander locked in a passionate embrace shattering as reality came crashing down like a load of bricks. "Mom?"  
  
"Buffy Summers! You know, if you didn't go out every night and stay out till all hours with your friends you might be able to get up in the morning. Now get dressed, and get downstairs! Xander and Cordelia are coming by to pick you up in a few minutes, so hurry!"  
  
Xander. It's getting harder and harder to look him in the eyes every day at school. I mean, this is the fifth time I've had this dream in the last week! I seriously need to talk to someone about this... 


	2. Chapter One

Buffy stretched catlike in bed, shaking off the last vestiges of sleep. Unconsciously, her hand reached up to trace her lips, her thoughts drifting back to the kisses she shared with Xander in her dream.  
  
Buffy sighed knowing how swollen her lips would have been had that dream been true. I HAVE to talk to Willow about this, if anyone would understand dreaming about Xanderkissage, she would.  
  
She slowly climbed out of bed, and walked over to her closet to survey her wardrobe. Buffy picked out a light blue baby-doll top and a short black mini-skirt to go along with it. After putting her outfit on with a pair of heels she surveyed herself in the mirror, "With this outfit, I wonder if Xander will even notice if Cordelia is even in the same car!" As soon as those words left her mouth Buffy groaned. Now I'm even dressing for Xander, what's going on with me? The funny thing is, I LIKE wanting to dress for him.  
  
Just as Buffy was applying the finishing touches to her make-up, Xander walked up to the Summers's front door and rang the bell. Joyce called up from the kitchen, "Buffy! Get a move on! Xander's here to pick you up for school!"  
  
Buffy smiled a secret smile to herself and ran down the stairs to answer the door. She flung open the door to the stunning sight of Xander wearing matching clothes and a sexy grin on his face. Buffy stared in awe at Xander before she managed to blurt out, "Xander! Wow... I've never seen you look so... well, like a Baldwin."  
  
Xander ducked his head shyly before returning his gaze to Buffy's eyes, "Well Buff, a guy can dress to impress every once in awhile. Besides Buffy, I've said it before and I'll say it again, you can turn the head of any guy, dead OR alive. You look gorgeous Buffy." Xander looked at Buffy with a lopsided smirk as he returned the appreciating gaze that Buffy initially gave him.  
  
Buffy blushed and looked over Xander's shoulder to the car. "Hey Xander, I think Cordy's getting a bit impatient. Shall we take the cue from her frown that it's time to go?"  
  
Xander chuckled and draped an arm over Buffy's shoulder as they walked to the car. Cordelia's frown deepened as they walked to the car, noticing with a grimace that Buffy was unconsciously leaning into Xander more and more with each step.  
  
Xander gentlemanly opened the car door for Buffy to get in before climbing in himself. After buckling his seatbelt, he reached over and took Cordelia's hand in his, giving her a smile that melted her anger right away. "I hope Snyder isn't patrolling the halls looking for victims, because we are going to be SO late, thanks to your little bonding scene back there." Cordelia said as she barreled around a corner, nearly scaring her passengers half to death.  
  
As Cordelia impersonated a sane driver, Buffy found herself drifting back into the world of dreams... 


	3. Chapter Two

It was another typical night at the bronze, and Buffy spotted her two buds, Xander and Willow, sitting together at a table. Her eyes locked on Xander, she approached their table. Smiling down on him with a look he had only previously seen her give to Angel, she reached out her hand to brush against his shirt. With a sultry look, she tugged on his shirt, pulling him towards her. "Let's dance."  
  
Xander gave her an uncertain look as she pulled him to the dance floor. "Ooo-kay"  
  
They began to slow dance, Buffy's movements with Xander sensual ones. Buffy turned around and spooned herself against Xander, pulling his arms around her waist. She smiled happily when she heard Xander's soft moan of content after she began to grind her hips and shoulders against him. Hmmm, this is nice. I should have been doing this with Xander a long time ago. Well, no time like the present to make up for lost time.  
  
Buffy let a small purr escape her lips as she felt Xander's breath brush against her ear when he softly whispered her name. While she continued to grind against him, she reached her hand up behind her head to caress his face. She let another whimper escape as she felt Xander's warm lips press against the column of her neck. Every touch of his lips to her neck sent jolts of electricity running up and down her body.  
  
Realizing with a shock what she has left undone, Buffy turned in Xander's arms, tilting her head so near to his that they almost kissed. "Xander?"  
  
Hearing his name whispered to him, he slowly let his eyes trail away from her wet lips and into her soft eyes. "Yeah Buffy?"  
  
Her lips neared ever closer to Xander's. "Did I ever thank you for saving my life?"  
  
Xander tried very hard to let Buffy's words and their hopeful implications sink in. Slowly he shook his head. "No. No you haven't Buffy."  
  
Buffy slowly let her tongue trail over her lips. "Then I think I ought to do something about that."  
  
Having said that, Buffy leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against Xander, wrapping her arms around his neck. She let her fingers trail through his dark hair, softly caressing his neck as his lips softly and passionately moved across hers.  
  
The couple was in such rapture that they never noticed the confused and hurt looks coming from both Angel and Willow. "Ooh Xander." Buffy moaned as Xander's lips began to trace across her jaw before beginning down her neck.  
  
****  
  
"Ohh Xander."  
  
Xander turned around with a start, not believing his ears. Xander looked back to see Buffy in a deep sleep, a content look on her face. Xander began to wake Buffy from her sleep, before it finally sank in that she had moaned his name in her sleep. HIS name was on her lips, not Angel's. His reverie was interrupted by his girlfriend's voice.  
  
"Xander?. Xander?. XANDER!!"  
  
He almost got whiplash in his efforts to spin around and face his girlfriend. "Yeah, Cordy?"  
  
"Did she say what I thought she just said? 'Cause what I thought she said was your name. Your name. In. A. Moan." She looked at her side mirror, so as not to let her boyfriend see the worry written on her face.  
  
"I can't see as how she did. I mean this is me we're talking about. I'm alive and breathing, not to mention awake, 'cause I can't see something like that happening except in the dream world. So we must have been imagining it."  
  
"Yeah, we must have." Cordelia agreed, not letting the worry her boyfriend's words caused in her to show. Buffy WAS moaning his name! I KNOW it! And I don't think he knows he let it slip, but he might've well admitted that he still dreams about Buffy. Which brings my biggest worry to life. If Buffy has feelings for Xander, and he still has them for her. Where does that leave me? 


	4. Chapter Three

As Cordelia pulled into her parking space at the high school, Xander slowly relaxed his death grip on the 'Oh Shit' handle. Thankful that "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" had finally come to a complete stop, he slowly began to unfurl himself out of the car. Right before he closed his car door however, he remembered that there was still a sleeping Buffy in the back seat. Turning to ask Cordelia for help in waking the Slayer, he saw her retreating form rushing off into the school, apparently in a huff.  
  
Shrugging, Xander leaned the passenger side seat forward and brushed his hand against Buffy's bare knee to wake her up. "Hey Buffy, I hate to wake you up, but I think detention from Snyder would put a crimp in the whole 'protect Sunnydale from evil' gig. So wake up, ok?"  
  
Her only response was to smile contentedly and snuggle into the leather of the back seat. Xander was melted by her sweet smile, and couldn't resist moving his hand up to gently cup her cheek. Unconsciously, she arched her back and began to rub her face against Xander's palm, nearly whimpering in her sleep. Without thinking, Xander brushed his thumb across her lips, wondering to himself how they would feel pressed against his. Why am I letting myself feel this way again? I've got Cordy, and I promised myself that I wouldn't let myself love Buffy anymore. But, God help me, I still do love her. I love her with all of my heart.  
  
The pressure of Xander's thumb against her lips was all that was needed to bring Buffy out of her dream. Slowly she opened her eyes, green eyes meeting his brown ones. "Mmm, wow."  
  
Luckily, Xander had noticed her stirring and had just enough time to snatch his betraying hand away from her face. "What was wow-worthy Buffster?"  
  
Still a bit hazy from sleep she blurted out the truth. "Mmm, that kiss. Never been kissed like that." Grinning like a maniac Xander leaned closer. "Oh yeah? And who was this magnificent kisser?"  
  
Realizing that this was real-Xander and not dream-Xander, she clamped her hand over her mouth and blushed a deep shade of red. After re-gaining her composure, she trusted her mouth enough to move her hand away. "Umm... Probably nobody you'd know."  
  
Already knowing the truth, Xander decided temporarily to take the high road. "Whatever you say, Buffy. Though I'm sure I know him better than you'd think." Well, not so high a road after all. Wondering how it would affect her, Xander offered his hand to help her out of the car, knowing full well she didn't need it.  
  
Blushing still, but unable to stop herself, she reached forward and placed her hand in his. As he closed his hand, she couldn't help but notice how small it seemed in his. Sort of like it was a safe shelter made just for her. Isn't that what he's been? A shelter for me? Always strong? Always there? Is this a dream too?  
  
Unconsciously stroking his thumb along her palm Xander tenderly pulled her out of the car. "Umm, we'd better hurry Buffy. That is unless you'd like to have detention for the next week. And detention is notorious for not letting you dream about your kissing friend." High road? Maybe a speed bump.  
  
Before the awakened Inner-Buffy could make herself show Xander exactly what a kissing friend was, they were interrupted by an irritating and utterly nasal voice. "You have no idea how right you are Harris. Except, that is, for the week part."  
  
"Oh, thank God. I love being wrong. In fact, 'Wrong' is my middle name. Isn't that right Buffy?" All Xander got in response were giggles.  
  
The comment even earned a smile from Snyder. Though on him it looked a lot more evil. "Strangely I can believe that Harris. However, you both have detention for the next TWO weeks. Now, come with me to the office!"  
  
The outburst by Snyder slowed Buffy's giggles as they headed inside. That is until she remembered a little factoid about Xander. "I thought your middle name was Lavelle?"  
  
Xander grimaced, which only caused Buffy to giggle harder. "Never speak of that again."  
  
*****  
  
Through massive consumption of Mountain Dew, Buffy was able to make it through third period without having another dream about Xander. That is, until fourth period Advanced Biology. Somehow, Willow talked her into signing up for this class at the beginning of the year. Other than being able to spend a class period with Willow, the class was a total waste of time.  
  
And it was apparently designed to torture her. Why else would they be learning about the mating habits of the male hyena? It's not like I didn't experience it myself. Hmmm, Hyena Xander. For some reason, thinking about Hyena Xander made her feel very drowsy. 


	5. Chapter Four

"Until Willow... stops kidding herself... that I could settle with anyone but you"  
  
Still unable to get herself out from under Xander, she looks up at him in shock. "You... you mean you know how Willow feels about you?"  
  
Xander responds with what Buffy would later describe as a yelping giggle. "Of course I knew." Leaning down, he started to nuzzle and sniff at her neck. "How could I not know? It's not like it's a state secret with her. Hell, other than you being the Slayer, I doubt there's one secret in the world she could keep."  
  
"Then don't... shouldn't you..." Buffy was fighting back the moan that Xander's nose was eliciting. Unfortunately, the effort seemed to shut down the part of her brain that regulated her speech.  
  
"You mean shouldn't I tell her?" He pulled back away from her neck to cut loose another laugh. Only this time, it struck Buffy as more cute than eerie. "I really think she'll figure things out once she sees you draped all over me like a curtain. Once I've claimed you as my mate."  
  
Buffy took his momentary distraction to scramble out from beneath Xander and back against the wall. "Me? But what about... I thought you and Heidi... Why me?"  
  
Leaning down, Xander stalked towards her on his hands and knees, looking very much like the predator that had possessed him. With a feral grin Xander started to crawl up her body. "Heidi? Sure, she'd be a good plaything. Hell, she'd probably make a GREAT plaything. But the pack leader needs something more. I need a mate. A strong mate. A sturdy mate."  
  
Buffy looked at him with a mixture of fear and desire. "Umm, sturdy? Does that mean what I think it does?"  
  
Xander grinned even wider and answered her by gently pushing up her shirt and running his tongue over her navel. "Well the pack leader does have to procreate." Looking up at her, she swore she could see his eyes flash with lust, and something else which she had to deny, at least for now. "And besides you being absolutely gorgeous, there's a couple more things you have that make you a better candidate than Heidi."  
  
When she felt Xander's wet tongue stroking over her stomach, her mind screamed for her to get away. Her mind however, was betrayed by her body, which arched up to meet his tongue, aching for more. "God, Xander. Tell me. What do I have?"  
  
Chuckling a little at her response Xander continued to dip his tongue into her navel. "Well, although Heidi's body is made for sin... so is yours, possibly even more so. And I'm willing to bet my Slayer is a closet freak waiting to be let out." He looked up at her to gauge the reaction to his fingers undoing the first button on her top. "Plus, I want my mate to be pure. I want to mark my territory permanently. Know what I mean?"  
  
Looking down at him with pure desire in her eyes, she growled slightly. "Mmm, you want a virgin do you? Want something fresh and nubile baby?" Lifting her hips slight off the floor, she spread her legs just enough to let Xander get a peek of her inner thighs. She grasped the back of Xander's head once she saw him sniffing the air. "Smell good to you Xander?"  
  
"You know that's what I want Buffy. And you smell so fucking good. So pure and clean. You smell like flowers and lust. You smell like you belong to me already." Nuzzling her leg with his face he prompted her to open them wider. "Heidi smells like all of the ones she's mated with. It's disgusting." Growling back at her, Xander began to push down her skirt, revealing a purple waistband. "Mmm, and besides, in case you haven't noticed... I'm in love with you."  
  
Hearing those words, Buffy temporarily snapped out of her lusty haze. "Xander! We can't... I've got Angel... or I want to see what I have with him... or see more of him..." Though her mouth was protesting she did nothing to stop Xander from pushing her skirt down a little further, revealing that she was wearing a tiny thong. "God Xander! We're just friends!"  
  
Xander tensed and yanked her skirt the rest of the way down. The chesire cat had nothing on Xander's grin as he noticed how soaked her tiny panties were. "Mmm Buffy, that doesn't look like friendly wetness to me." Leaning closer, he growled his approval. "I didn't know you liked to trim the field Buffy."  
  
Buffy mewled like a kitten that was being teased. "I'm so confused Xander. I don't know what to do! Tell me... what would I have to do as your mate?"  
  
Xander lowered his head until his lips were only inches away from the purple lace that covered Buffy's treasure. "Hmm, you mean besides the sex?" Waiting for her response Xander gripped the waistband of her panties with his teeth.  
  
She shuddered, and raised her hips. "Yessssss." Shaking her head clear for a moment she replied, "Yeah, besides the sex."  
  
Growling like a playful puppy, Xander started to tug her panties downward, slowly revealing his prize. Knowing what kind of state it would put her in, Xander let his nose drag across the flesh he was revealing. "Well, eventually the pack will need to grow. Funny thing is, I've already got all the pups named."  
  
Buffy screamed in pleasure as Xander's nose drug over her clit. "Oh God! Xander!" Looking down at him with confused, yet lust-filled eyes. "Will I have to... you know be with the rest of the pack?" Oh, god. Am I seriously accepting the fact that I'm going to be his mate?  
  
Xander growled deeply and ferally, yanking his head backward... tearing her panties from her body. "No! Buffy is MINE!" Proving this fact to her, Xander began to mark her with broad strokes of his tongue.  
  
All Buffy could do was moan and writhe, her fingers running through Xander's hair.  
  
*****  
  
Willow looked over at her best friend, and her eyes nearly fell out of her sockets as she saw Buffy squirm and gyrate in her seat. To Willow, it seemed like she was performing this sensual, but horribly naughty dance right there in her seat.  
  
Leaning over, Willow started to shake Buffy's shoulder, trying to wake her up before she embarrassed herself. "Buffy! Wake up!"  
  
"Oh YES! I'm all yours baby!" Buffy screamed out as she shot backwards, toppling out of her seat.  
  
Mr McClaine spun around, fixing Buffy with an intense stare. "I'm sure that you and Ms Rosenburg can express your undying love to each other later on in detention."  
  
Willow just laid her head into her hands with a loud sigh. "God, I should have just let her sleep." 


	6. Chapter Five

Thankfully, Buffy managed to avoid Willow and Xander for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, she was about to spend several hours in the same room, with both of them. She was dreading detention. Partially because she knew she was going to have to field a ton of annoying questions from Willow. But mainly because she was so wound up and horny from night after night of increasingly explicit and realistic fantasies of the man she wasn't attracted to. I. AM. NOT. ATTRACTED. TO. XANDER!  
  
The worst part of it all was that each dream built upon the arousal of the last, and seemed to stop right before she got to enjoy them. All I want is for Xander to finish what he started! Is that so much to ask? Did I just think that?  
  
Her shoulders slumped as she walked into detention, her fate sealed. Sitting down as far from Willow as possible, she waited for the usual speech from the detention monitor.  
  
"Personally I don't care what you do. Just stay in your seats and try to keep it down. I don't want to be here any more than you do. So don't bother me, and I won't bother you." Buffy's slayer hearing was able to hear a mumbled, "I'm not even supposed to be here today!" He looked up and continued, "Does everyone understand me?"  
  
A unified but not enthusiastic mutter followed. "Yes, Mr. Hicks."  
  
As she watched Willow work her way over, Buffy tried to shrink down in her seat. Unfortunately, Willow had her 'nosey-face' on. Which meant she wasn't very well likely to avoid ripping into Willow. There's only so much a girl on edge can handle.  
  
Sitting down right behind Buffy, she leaned forward with a bright and curious gleam in her eyes. "So was Miss Buffy Summers having a S-E-X dream in Biology class?"  
  
"Don't go there Willow."  
  
"Well, I wouldn't if your outburst hadn't made the whole class think you and I were having some sort of lesbian affair! What on earth were you doing in that dream?"  
  
Buffy turned around in a fluid motion, and grabbed Willow on each side of her face, and sharply twisted until she heard a satisfying snap.  
  
"Buffy!"  
  
Buffy blinked a few times, clearing the pleasing vision of breaking Willow's neck, and replacing it with the very real, very annoying copy. Buffy answered her in a quiet seething whisper. "What? What do you want to hear Willow? Do you want me to tell you that I was having an erotic dream? Ok fine! I was having a SEX dream Willow! A very pleasing, very satisfying dream, which you interrupted! Interrupted, I might add, before I could get to the good parts!"  
  
Willow's eyes simply lit up. "So what did Angel do?"  
  
"It wasn't Angel okay! It was Xander!" Once she realized what she said, her face flushed a deep shade of red.  
  
"WHAT!!!"  
  
Sitting a few seats away, Xander raised his head. "Trying to sleep here. Talk about your freaky lesbian stuff later!"  
  
Dante Hicks looked up. "I agree. If I wanted to hear about lesbians I'd just go back to Jersey. Why can't you kids talk about hockey or something?" Buffy could again hear him mutter under his breath, "I'm not even getting paid for this. I could be back at the Quick Stop but noooooo, Ronnie wanted me to get an education!"  
  
Buffy and Willow just looked at Dante blankly before turning back to whisper to each other. "Xander? How could you be dreaming about him, Buffy? You're in love with Angel! You can't be having dreams about Xander! He's off limits Buffy!"  
  
"OFF LIMITS! What is that supposed to mean Willow? Why CAN'T I be having dreams about Xander? Would it really be so bad if he and I were together? Or is it really because if you can't have him, you don't want anyone else to have him?"  
  
Xander lifted his head back up with a deep scowl. "What the fuck does, 'trying to sleep' mean in your language!?! Unless you're going to share with the Xand-man, let me get back to sleep!" Buffy just turned towards him, looking at his lips as he spoke. Slowly she crossed the room, and pressed her lips to his. Kissing him deeply and passionately.  
  
"What? Do I have some drool hanging off my lips? What are you looking at Buff?"  
  
Buffy realized he was talking to her, and shook her head clear again, realizing that she was starting to dream while wide awake now.  
  
"Oh God Buffy. You're doing it right now aren't you? The dream thing, I mean."  
  
With a tinge of guilt mixed with embarrassment, Buffy gave her a slow nod.  
  
Whispering harshly, "You can't have him Buffy! You've already got Angel. Don't you see? It won't last with Cordelia... it just won't."  
  
Xander, barely registering what was being said around him, became fully alert when Cordelia's name was mentioned. "What was that Willow? About Cordelia?"  
  
Buffy narrowed her eyes at her redheaded friend, the big picture coming into focus. "Yeah, tell him Willow. Tell him what you said about him and Cordelia."  
  
Looking down at her feet Willow squeaked out that she knew that Cordelia and Xander wouldn't last.  
  
Standing up Xander looked at the girl he called friend with disgust. "Gee thanks for the vote of confidence Wills. I don't know what I'd do without your support!" Turning towards the drowsy form of Mr. Hicks. "Do you mind if I go to the library? Where I can sleep in quiet?" Dante just merely dismissed him with his hand.  
  
Willow's face could only be described as looking like melted butter. Softly she said, "Now, I've done it. When him and Cordelia break up, he won't be running to me for comfort."  
  
Buffy's voice took on a hard edge once she made sure Xander was out of sight. "I can't believe you, Willow. You don't give a damn about Oz do you? He's just someone convenient till Xander comes crawling back isn't he?" Her eyes narrowing, Buffy began to poke Willow in the shoulder with her finger. "Is that why I can't be having these dreams Willow? Because if I have feelings for him, that's just one more obstacle in the way isn't it?"  
  
Willow could only nod and try to look penitent. "Yes. It's all true. He doesn't see how bad she is for him, Buffy. How good we'd be together."  
  
Buffy thought back over her first days at SHS, and for the first time had to face reality. "You knew from the start how he felt about me didn't you? I want the truth. Is it just a crush?" Willow almost lied to Buffy, but thought better of it. "You know it's not. It never has been. I knew you didn't have any friends though, and that you wouldn't poach on my territory..."  
  
"What? So you weren't all gung ho for Angel because you thought he was the right guy for me? Did you just want me out of the way?"  
  
Willow looked up with anger. "And it would have worked, too, if you'd just have waited ten more minutes before coming back from LA this year! Xander was almost mine, and you had to come back and steal his heart back all over again. And Xander was all but ready to give up on you again 'till you couldn't keep Angel out of your pants!"  
  
When Willow looked into Buffy's eyes, she almost felt a twinge of guilt when she saw they were flooded with tears. "Do you know that I considered Xander as a viable choice before you started erecting billboards telling me how you felt?" All Buffy could do was shake her head in sadness. "All of this death, all of my misery, just because you didn't want Xander to follow his heart."  
  
"He's not yours to have Buffy! I was with him since the start! He's MINE!" Willow looked desperate as she screamed at Buffy. "Him being with Cordelia is your fault, too! He hated her before you came along and clouded his mind with your Slayerness!"  
  
"That's it! Fuck this job! All I want to do is have some free time to play hockey! Jesus, if I wanted to hear homosexual love spats I'd go over to Banky and Hooper's! I'm taking Veronica and going back to Jersey." With that Dante slipped on his Whalers jersey and stormed out of the room.  
  
Seeing her opening, Buffy quickly followed suit. But before leaving the room, she turned back to Willow. "Seek help. Serious psychiatric help. Maybe you can still salvage a relationship with Oz out of this. He really loves you, you know? I hope I don't have to tell Giles why Ms Calendar is dead."  
  
Buffy ran down the halls to the library, thinking about what Willow had done, and more importantly wondering what choice she would have made all on her own. 


End file.
